Susan Sews: The End -- of March!! Whaaaatt???

Monday, March 29, 2021

The End -- of March!! Whaaaatt???

Three months into 2021 I'm wondering what the heck happens to time as you get older. It seems to telescope, or zoom past. Zooming used to mean going fast, now it's meetings where you only worry about the state of your hair and what kind of top you put on, and you're wearing pj bottoms or fuzzy slippers!

ZZZZZZZZZZZZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM!

And another month has disappeared. What have I accomplished?

Finish it February is over. I managed to finish a couple of old stinker projects. A sweater I don't even remember casting on; a cowl I started at least three years ago; a pair of socks that only requires the closure of the toes. What I didn't manage was to figure out why I ever stopped knitting on these items in the first place.

I have decided I need some fiber therapy. I'm tired of people and meetings. Well not ALL people, just a few select people.

I recently had an encounter that was very upsetting. Someone with whom I work did something they shouldn't have which made extra work for me, and I was angry. I encountered said person not intending to speak to them, but they spotted me and started justifying and explaining. I said "I can't talk about this now, I'm still too upset." This person just ignored that statement and continued their diatribe. I said again "I don't want to talk now". Same result.

I should have walked away. I deeply regret not walking away, because I spoke up, listing several reasons why I was upset about what had happened. The other person was smiling and nodding like you do when someone else is talking, but obviously not listening because immediately after I stopped talking they went back to more of the same stuff as if I hadn't spoken.

I finally just turned and left the room, which is what I had intended to do in the first place.

Later I received an apology in email in which this person said they were sorry they were not 'communicating well'.

COMMUNICATION: NOUN
the imparting or exchanging of information or news.
the successful conveying or sharing of ideas and feelings.

Obviously I believe communication is a joint venture, where two or more people exchange information or ideas. Each listens to the other. Obviously I was the person not communicating well because the things I said didn't penetrate into the conciousness of the other person.

CONCIOUS: ADJECTIVE
aware of and responding to one's surroundings; awake.

The apology was long and wordy and ended with a classic passive-aggressive statement that was probably intended to make me feel guilty over the anguish I had caused the person by being upset. But instead it made me even more upset. I lost a couple hours of sleep and thought of all sorts of things I could have said if the conversation had continued.

However!! I didn't say any of them. I responded to the email saying that the particular martyrdom offered up was not required, but that in future the proper thing to do would be to blah-blah-blah for the protection of all parties involved and let's leave it at that. Phrased very diplomatically and omitting all emotion.

After that I resolved to try to learn not to react or say things that might momentarily feel good but don't solve the issue. And to limit the interactions with this person to only the very necessary. The apology offered is basically worthless because the person completely missed the point, and hasn't enough respect for me to listen when I speak. The thing they're sorry for is that they've been seen to be wrong and someone other than me knows it.

Ah, Reader, it's sad for me to realize that some people just have to be avoided in order to retain sanity! Is it Pandemic Behavior, or is this something that this person has always done and I just can't tolerate it any longer? I retreat from this type of behavior, it's exhausting to deal with and I don't want to do it any more.

Can I just stay in my house forever, and not deal with difficult people?

Sadly, no.